FML

[Sofa]

On a less revolting note, I appear to have lost the ability to make TITH recently. I used to make a beautifully puffed up light and fluffy batter, and now all I can make is stodge.

I went through a stage of this too, and realised my batter was too thick. Add a bit more milk next time.

I'm ignoring the maggots sentence. It'll happen to me one day, I know it will. So far I've been presented with a live pigeon, a live baby rabbit screaming at the end of my bed at 5am in the morning, live small rodents and various live small birds. Dead animals have included rabbits, a hare, pheasants, robins, voles, mice and partridges. Cats are foul.

[Squirrel]

I appear to have lost the ability to make TITH recently. I used to make a beautifully puffed up light and fluffy batter, and now all I can make is stodge.

FML.

This has happened to me too!

[Figaro]

I feel your pain, Sofa. I had all of the above from my childhood cat, plus an injured squirrel and a bat with bitten wings. I set up an animal hospital in the airing cupboard but skills and resources were limited and mortality rates were high

[Texaco Shirley]

Sod it. Realised at a minute to 11 that I hadn't updated the sainsburys order, cancel option had already disappeared, 18 cartons of milk in trolley. After earlier success have tweeted about it.

[ozbird]

18 cartons?? Are you running a coffee shop from your house? Perhaps if you do, it'll become the new hipster trend - going out for coffee whilst being at home.

I hope Sainsburys see your tweet.

[Texaco Shirley]

It was a placeholder.

[olive]

Hope you can get your order changed, Tex.

FML this morning as I managed to forget to pick up a spoon for my porridge. However, the girl sat across me has a Leon protein pot and her egg is practically raw so it could be worse.

[Ella77]

Argh!

[Texaco Shirley]

Me too olive. At worst I can probably refuse it and forfeit the delivery charge but it would be better for everyone if it was just cancelled.

[smalex]

This is your opportunity to start that cheese making business you've always wanted Tex! Texaco Dairies. Cheese of Shirley

[Texaco Shirley]

Hopefully Seamus of customer services is sorting it out now.

[Texaco Shirley]

Milk crisis averted.

[olive]

Hooray! Was it as a result of your tweet?

I have managed to sit a million miles away from the buffet car and as I was walking towards it the train lurched and I grab the toilet door handle. The bloody thing slid open full pelt taking me with it which was mortifying. :shame:

[Texaco Shirley]

No, it was the result of a phone call.

[Squirrel]

Yay! I was wondering if you could accept the delivery, then presumably as you'll still need to do the shopping, return all the milk. But cancelling it altogether is more betterer.

[Texaco Shirley]

The timing wouldn't have worked out very well and there isn't room in the fridge. It's all OK now though, I can stop twitching.

[Derek Nimmo]

Oh no Olive! Did you fall spectacularly and / or expose someone in the middle of their ablutions? At least it wasn't on the way back from the buffet car when your food and drink may have been at risk :priorities:

[olive]

Thankfully not, Derek

Once I fell sprawled across a table of four surprised men working at a table.

[Derek Nimmo]

Are you on a Virgin Pendolino? I find them right bastards for staying upright.

[olive]

No thankfully. I'm on a old East Coast train.

One of my colleagues is built like the Hulk almost went through a window of the pendolino!