Help please - alcoholic friend

[Ismee]

Just a little update.

Friend stopped drinking on Sunday and has been back to normal this week. She has an appointment a week on Monday with a charity that help people with mental health and addiction problems. She says she really wants to sort it once and for all but I have heard that many times before. I can only hope she will go and it will help.

She messaged me this morning and ranted about her husband as he is digging up the garden and doing all sorts and she said her anxiety is through the roof and she can't cope with it. A big part of her problem is that she is unhappy in her marriage but her drinking and the fact that he has cancer has made all of that really complicated.

But anyway, small steps and a big improvement to this time last week!

[Ruby]

Is, when you say she stopped drinking, do you mean she totally stopped? Because that could be really dangerous.

[Ismee]

She does it all the time Ruby, just goes cold turkey after going through several bottles a day. I don't know how.

After we took her to A&E last time, the Dr told her to gradually cut down her drinking each day but she can't do that, once she has a drink, she wants more so she just has to stop.

[Ruby]

Jesus. That is very risky isn't it? I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. It's really hard.

[Luna]

That is risking a seizure which is what happened to my mum.
She’s stuck in a loop because of her relationship with her husband which is really tricky. I don’t see it changing unless she has the courage to leave him.

[yellowtulip]

I went through this for years with my ex husband and tried everything - ultimately sadly there is nothing that can be done. Some people have to lose everything in order to get sober, but others will lose everything and still not manage it, there's no rhyme or reason to it really. I filed for divorce mid-2022, got it finalised early 2023 and he finally moved out last October. I hoped it would ultimately have a positive effect but he's basically been in and out of hospital ever since and it's all very chaotic. I have had to detach for my own sanity and this may be what you need to do too, which sounds cruel and is sad, but alcoholism can drag down everyone around it and sometimes you need to choose yourself.