Early Pregnancy Thread

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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie » Mon Jan 13, 2020 8:12 pm

I'm sorry, it's such a terrible time. Would it be worth trying the anti histamine anti sickness tablets?
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Beatrix
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Beatrix » Mon Jan 13, 2020 8:56 pm

Thanks for the sympathy both. I don’t think it warrants medicating. Once I’m sick there is some relief, and the nausea goes if I eat. It just seems rude that I’m waking up in the night to be sick :lg:.

Figaro
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Figaro » Mon Jan 13, 2020 9:21 pm

It’s the worst, Beatrix! I used to set my alarm for about 2-3am - once I identified the time I was waking up to be sick I set it for just before that. I would have a snack and go back to sleep and it did help (a bit) to prevent being woken up by an overwhelming urge to vomit.

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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Princess Morripov » Mon Jan 13, 2020 10:10 pm

It was so horrible second time round not being able to nap when I wanted :cry: I found the tiredness hit like hell around 3pm and Tupac has always been a late morning napper so I just would try and survive it in a bit of a daze, I really sympathise. And the amount of times I’d rush around getting ready, getting to work, not having breakfast (as I never normally would) and missing the mark on eating in time to not feel absolutely disgusting for the rest of the day, it was so grim. I have nothing helpful to add sorry, I hope you feel less grim soon.

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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie » Mon Jan 13, 2020 10:30 pm

I'm glad eating helps. Horrible for you though.
If your back's against the wall, turn around and write on it.

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Beatrix
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Beatrix » Mon Jan 13, 2020 11:12 pm

What has life come to when one has to set an alarm in the middle of the night to eat a cracker to avoid being sick?! :cry:

I’m in bed most nights by 8, and very fortunate that apart from Mondays I don’t have to get up too early - last time it definitely made the nausea worse waking up to an alarm and having to set it earlier so I had time to be sick before going to work :ella:. Roll on the end of the first/worst trimester!

The solidarity helps, thank you.

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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by lorri_b » Tue Jan 14, 2020 4:39 pm

That sounds really grim Beatrix. I hope it eases off soon.

I'm feeling really awful at the moment. Came down with what I thought was flu. Urine results came back yesterday with some type of infection. So that's me on antibiotics for a week.

I have my 12 week scan on Friday, crossing my fingers I'm well enough to go.

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Beatrix
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Beatrix » Tue Jan 14, 2020 5:41 pm

Oh poor you, I hope the antibiotics kick in quickly. I hope all goes well with your scan, too.

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Beatrix
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Beatrix » Wed Jan 15, 2020 10:54 am

I had my booking-in appointment yesterday, and it's still on my mind. I felt quite emotional during it, partly down to hormones, but also we discussed my pregnancy and birth experience the first time around and they (midwife and student midwife) were quite surprised by how difficult and disjointed it had been - it wasn't until they started telling me how it would be with them (different NHS trust) that I realised that perhaps my experience was quite poor and I should have had a lot more care and concern. It's made me feel quite sad.

I've always been very flippant about my morning sickness because it's nothing like as bad as what some experience, and it doesn't stop me really, it's boring and tedious but I just got used to it. The midwife yesterday said someone should have taken more notice because it was disruptive and lasted for the duration - she was sad for me that I never saw the same midwife twice for any of my antenatal appointments. This time she said I must keep them updated, even if there's not much they can do, they can talk about it and check it's not getting me down.

Also with M's birth, again I've always been of the opinion although it wasn't anything like I expected (when is it?) but that it wasn't that bad and it all came good. The midwife asked a few questions about what happened and why and I found I couldn't answer some of them because I didn't actually know why certain things had happened. She said that it sounded scary and panicked, and that my husband shouldn't have felt "scarred" by the process. She's right, it was terrifying and there was a lot we didn't know. I did some reading about things afterwards and never really worked out why things escalated as quickly as they did.

They're very keen on home births for low risk pregnancies - the alternative is hospital as there are no midwife-led centres locally. I was kind of resigned to hospital this time because of what happened last time, but after yesterday I'm not sure. I wanted to have M at home and the midwife said I should have been able to then, so why not this time.

Sorry, TL;DR, just a splurge.

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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by lorri_b » Wed Jan 15, 2020 11:23 am

I'm not surprised you're feeling a bit low Beatrix. I don't think it's fair on yourself to compare your experiences to those who have had it worse though.

Your first labour experiences sounds very familiar to me. My first labour I found very traumatic too. It was very long, complicated and upsetting. I have some gaps too (apparently I was offered a c-section but declined!).

When I was pregnant with my second, I was pretty terrified of doing it again. But it was the complete opposite of the first time. I found it very healing.

The care already sounds much better that you've experienced, and the midwife sounds great.

I've heard good things about 'Give birth like a Feminist' book being very empowering, might be worth a read.

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Estrella
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Estrella » Wed Jan 15, 2020 11:49 am

lorri_b wrote:
Wed Jan 15, 2020 11:23 am
When I was pregnant with my second, I was pretty terrified of doing it again. But it was the complete opposite of the first time. I found it very healing.
This is exactly my experience. Highly medicalised, stressful first birth. That actually I didn’t realise the extent of until a midwife looked at the birth notes during my pregnancy with S. But second time was a dream. I was better equipped mentally too. About the control I was able to assert.

I hope you’re ok, Bea.

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Rhodonite
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Rhodonite » Wed Jan 15, 2020 12:52 pm

I'm sorry you had such a hard birth the first time around.

I can really really recommend the online course (or they do a book too) from The Positive Birth company. It is a hypnobirthing course, but not in a woo type of way. It's very science based, and sort of coaches you in all the questions you might want to ask during your pregnancy and labour, to ensure you are making informed decisions.

Here's a wee clip of them talking through using the acronym BRAIN, to help you ask questions.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7l1MlA0pyg8

It really helped calm me down before the birth second time around.

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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie » Wed Jan 15, 2020 1:40 pm

I hope you're feeling better, Lorri.

I'm sorry you had such a bad birth experience, Beatrix. It's good that your midwife sounds much better this time. I think it also helps to talk about it especially to people who can explain things to you.

On the sickness front, it may not officially qualify as hyperemesis if you're not losing weight/dehydrated, but it's definitely not something you should just put up with just because other people have it worse, and I think waking up to be sick and having it last through the whole pregnancy is definitely towards the much worse side of normal. You may not want to have medication which is totally your decision, but the first line stuff (cyclizine etc) is very low risk to the baby (it was only the other stuff that I was prescribed by the hospital where there was evidence of possible issues), so it might be worth a try to see if it does help at all? But if you don't feel comfortable taking anything then obviously that doesn't mean you don't deserve to complain as much as you want.
If your back's against the wall, turn around and write on it.

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Beatrix
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Beatrix » Wed Jan 15, 2020 1:42 pm

Thanks for your replies.

I did a hypnobirthing course before M and I think that definitely helped me stay calm, and I mean to do the online course with the Positive Birth Company this time - I remember you saying about it when you were pregnant Rhod. I suppose what’s thrown me is someone telling me that what I thought/convinced myself was okay actually wasn’t and it could/should have been better. I guess that gives me something to work towards this time though.

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Beatrix
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Beatrix » Wed Jan 15, 2020 1:46 pm

Thanks, Ken. They offered me cyclizine yesterday, if it seems like it’s not going to go away this time I’ll be asking for something.

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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie » Wed Jan 15, 2020 1:50 pm

That's great that they offered it to you - very proactive! I think don't suffer anymore than you have to add it's such a rubbish time anyway and must be really hard with M to look after as well.

I think cyclizine is in the same category as paracetamol if that helps your decision at all.
If your back's against the wall, turn around and write on it.

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Rhodonite
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Rhodonite » Wed Jan 15, 2020 5:18 pm

That's exactly the experience the woman who runs the course had, Beatrix. She thought her birth was fine and totally normal because everything you see and hear about birth, is what she experienced! Then in her next pregnancy someone (a mw I think, I can't quite remember) described it as traumatic, and it threw her a bit. Then she realised it didn't have to be that way.

A birth can still end with induction, or with an epidural or c-section but as long as you are making informed decisions along the way, you'll feel much more in control.

You get access to a private Facebook group, and I loved reading so the birth stories every evening. I still need to do mine actually.

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Froozy
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Froozy » Wed Jan 15, 2020 8:56 pm

I’m sorry you had such a difficult experience first time, Beatrix. Do you think asking for a birth reflection thing would help? It’s great your midwives are so proactive and supportive this time.

Would it be worth getting the cyclizine now and keeping it for if you feel you need it? I really hope the sickness settles down for you soon.

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