The Mock Turtle

Texaco Shirley · Post by **Texaco Shirley** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 9:37 am

Sainsburys are following me on twitter now.

Livilla · Post by **Livilla** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 9:38 am

Quick, tweet lots!

Smunder Woman · Post by **Smunder Woman** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 11:58 am

They're following me too since I complained about their sun cream

Duophonic · Post by **Duophonic** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 12:05 pm

FML - we have photographers in today and I have the biggest, angriest spot on the corner of my mouth. Nothing will cover it.

Lovely Me · Post by **Lovely Me** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:45 pm

FML - I just flashed my bra to my only male coworker.

My beige, ugly, strapless bra. To my beige, ugly coworker.

Pippedydeadeye · Post by **Pippedydeadeye** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 5:02 am

I spent all day yesterday Judy Finnegan style flashing my beige, ugly strapless bra at people in the Kennedy Space Centre. I've thrown the stupid flashing cowl neck top in the bin.

Loralei · Post by **Loralei** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 12:56 pm

I accidentally got very, very drunk last night and have had to entertain three children while being so hungover I couldn't move without retching. FML.

Heebie Jeebie · Post by **Heebie Jeebie** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:01 pm

That sounds awful. When can you hand them over?

Epponnee Rae · Post by **Epponnee Rae** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:10 pm

Oof, poor Lora! I hope you managed to keep the children and yourself as still and quiet as possible.

I slept through Crossfit this morning and there's no evening class today so now I have to miss leaving drinks for someone I really like to go to the 5.30pm class. FML

Vermilingua · Post by **Vermilingua** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:11 pm

Can't you just miss crossfit?

Epponnee Rae · Post by **Epponnee Rae** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:18 pm

I am on A Plan, so if I miss it it screws up that, and more importantly, the weekend as I'll have to fit it in then.

Kenickie · Post by **Kenickie** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:45 pm

Definitely sack off the cross fit.

I was just sat on my bed, when I noticed a massive spider crawling up my arm. I flung off my cardie, but now I don't know where it's gone so I'm paranoid that it's still on me somewhere, or in my hair. The absolute best case scenario is that it's hiding around the bed ready to crawl on me tonight.

Disco · Post by **Disco** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 4:04 pm

Omg Ken! You must seek it out!

Kenickie · Post by **Kenickie** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 4:06 pm

I've tried, and can't find it.

Vermilingua · Post by **Vermilingua** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 4:09 pm

It's probably in your ear.

Loralei · Post by **Loralei** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 4:56 pm

Comforting, Verm.

P was late for work due to my being pathetic, so won't be home until after 6. We're just heading back from swimming and I am desperately hoping a student will be in to entertain them while I furtively eat cake under the pretence of making dinner.

la Fée Verte · Post by **la Fée Verte** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 5:00 pm

Lora.

Texaco Shirley · Post by **Texaco Shirley** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 5:21 pm

Oh dear Lora

My two did not dissolve in the rain but do appear to have brought half the woods home in their wellies.

cluefree · Post by **cluefree** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 7:05 pm

Lora!

FML because I might have to leave the best job ever (best people, best situation) because my boss is a cock-out nightmare who keeps getting madder and madder and I can't escape her to move elsewhere within the practice.

Also FML because I have the world's smallest bottle of prosecco when I want the world's biggest.

brown pony · Post by **brown pony** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 7:08 pm

Those are two terrible FMLs there, Cloof.

The Mock Turtle

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