The Mock Turtle

We have to specify in advance who is sous ("Sue") here, because making me Sue is the only way to stop me sticking my oar in when he's in charge, and when he's Sue I can correct his chopping technique as much as I like because it has been agreed that he is my bitch this time .

Believe it or not this is progress. We can actually cook together without incident now .

Because he's still dicking about with the bike (doing who knows what) and I can't get my washing up. I should tell him what the bike man said :snigger:

Mine decided that the best way not to have our heating oil stolen was to top up the tank 25 ltrs at a time. That's fine ... as long as you remember to keep checking the level. He's been out there for half an hour now, bleeding the boiler and trying to get it to fire.

MacSplendide wrote:Because he's still dicking about with the bike (doing who knows what) and I can't get my washing up. I should tell him what the bike man said :snigger:

You're going to blurt it out at some point when you're pissed, so you might as well.

overthehill wrote:Mine decided that the best way not to have our heating oil stolen was to top up the tank 25 ltrs at a time. That's fine ... as long as you remember to keep checking the level. He's been out there for half an hour now, bleeding the boiler and trying to get it to fire.

Put a lock on the tank.

Saying that, IU've been on oil for the past 7 years, in various locations, and I've never had oil stolen. Actually, I don't know anyone who has either. Is it a big risk in your area OTH?

Sofa wrote:

overthehill wrote:Mine decided that the best way not to have our heating oil stolen was to top up the tank 25 ltrs at a time. That's fine ... as long as you remember to keep checking the level. He's been out there for half an hour now, bleeding the boiler and trying to get it to fire.

Put a lock on the tank.

Saying that, IU've been on oil for the past 7 years, in various locations, and I've never had oil stolen. Actually, I don't know anyone who has either. Is it a big risk in your area OTH?

We used to have a padlock on the filler cap, but it doesn't make any difference. If they can't remove the filler cap, they'll use the vent or drill a hole in the bottom of the tank. We've had our fuel nicked twice - before we gave up on the lock - now we just leave the tank empty, lest we find ourselves having to replace it completely! It is a big problem here. We have heard of areas where the thieves actually follow the delivery trucks around.

Because I believe you when you say it's cold outside. You don't have to try rousting me out of bed by putting your freezing hands on my warm back to prove it.

I do that to Partner to piss him off on purpose.

Me too. My hands are permanently like little blocks of ice, so it's not even a particularly reliable guide to the weather. Fun, though

My mum does it to my dad.

overthehill wrote: We used to have a padlock on the filler cap, but it doesn't make any difference. If they can't remove the filler cap, they'll use the vent or drill a hole in the bottom of the tank. We've had our fuel nicked twice - before we gave up on the lock - now we just leave the tank empty, lest we find ourselves having to replace it completely! It is a big problem here. We have heard of areas where the thieves actually follow the delivery trucks around.

That would drive me utterly insane. What a sodding nightmare.

Mine is snoring on the sofa so that I cannot hear the tv, but waking up every half hour or so to deny being asleep. I am *this close* to holding a pillow over his stupid snuffling face.

That really boils my piss. And we have it a lot here too.

Infuriating isn't it? Why in the name of fuck would I say he was snoring if he wasn't? I'm thinking of going to bed and leaving him to freeze, but then he'll probably wake me with his stomping and huffing when he finally does come up.

Mine was doing that last night. Why do they deny it? Surely they know they've been asleep, the tools.

"Are you watching this or sleeping?"
*snort* "NO! No. I'm awake."
"Shall I turn it off then?"
"I'm watching. I just had my eyes closed."
"Why don't you go to bed if you're tired?"
"I'm watching it! Press play."
*stab*

Pippedydeadeye wrote:Mine was doing that last night. Why do they deny it? Surely they know they've been asleep, the tools.

I get this, too. 'I can't have been snoring, as I was awake '

Yes you were!! I was lying next to you and could hear every inhalation and exhalation :grump:.

Now that J has moved out, I have commandeered his room, as it is as far from the master bedroom as it is possible to get. It has saved Mr M's eyeballs, and probably his actual life.

I had an ex who used to snore and claim to be awake.
He's dead now.

I do that

Do you really think you're awake?