FML

[Ismee]

I agree with sally, and I want to encourage you to extricate yourself from this if you can.

I know Ella, Mr Is, my Sister, everyone is telling me that I need to put an end to it and I do want to.

[Penny Century]

This is unfortunately a bit of a risk with local volunteer/mutual aid type groups. There's not the same protections for volunteers as there are with more established third sector support services. If there is a co-ordinator (I guess there must be, as you were given his details) could you ask them to get in touch with him?

[Ismee]

Ok so there has been a development.

I sent a message on the Covid 19 WhatsApp group and asked for the details of the organiser. I phoned her and had a really good chat. She asked me to get his permission to pass his number to her as another of the volunteers who started the group works in social care and she agrees that it's too much for me.

I called him and explained and he kept asking me if I would continue to do his shopping as he is used to me and trusts me and I said that I wouldn't do it forever as it was a temporary arrangement. He asked if he'd done something wrong and I explained him that I just felt he needed more help.

So anyway, I've passed his number over and hopefully it will get sorted and I'll be able to step away and he'll get the help he needs!!!

[Rosa]

You're such a good person. Don't feel obliged to continue to do his shopping, he's not your responsibility and you have enough going on. It does sound like you'll be able to step away soon though.

[Ismee]

Thank you Rosa. Honestly, why couldn't I have just got a lovely old lady who just needed the odd loaf of bread!

[Rosa]

That would have perfect!

[Cerise]

Well done, Ismee. It’s hard to deal with tough stuff!

[sally maclennane]

I'm glad its sorted, Is! You are a good person x

[Ella77]

Thank you Rosa. Honestly, why couldn't I have just got a lovely old lady who just needed the odd loaf of bread!

Those women would never dream of “bothering” others, that’s the thing. It’s always the ones who take it a bit too far. I’m glad you’ve found a resolution. Nicely handled!

[Disco]

Phew, thank goodness Isme. You're so sweet.

[Pippedydeadeye]

Well handled, Ismee.

[Heebie Jeebie]

Thank you Rosa. Honestly, why couldn't I have just got a lovely old lady who just needed the odd loaf of bread!

Those women would never dream of “bothering” others, that’s the thing. It’s always the ones who take it a bit too far. I’m glad you’ve found a resolution. Nicely handled!

That's the trouble isn't it? I'm glad you found a resolution too, it's so difficult to say no at the best of times and even worse when it is/has been a crisis situation and you actively volunteered to help. But you still don't owe anyone anything other than the basic courtesy of being clear about your intention to stop.

[rosy]

You handled that really well, Ismee.

[Tits McGee]

Oh Ismee, I came out in a cold sweat reading that! I'm glad you've sorted it out.

[olive]

I’m glad you got it sorted, Ismee. You are such a good person.

[Loralei]

Well done, Ismee. It is a hazard of this kind of volunteering, which is why it's so important proper support is in place for volunteers. I'm glad you got it sorted, and you did it in your usual kind way.

[Ismee]

Thank you Lora.

This morning I went for a walk and a coffee with my neighbour. I started telling her about this man and she was really shocked as it turns out her daughter has been dealing with him too! She said that he rings her all the time and she has also bought him vodka and brandy. He has asked her to do some hoovering for him and also to help him go out for a walk and she refused both those things.

She was put in touch with him through an NHS voluntary group and even phoned his GP once and tried to get them to help him.

So strange. I haven't heard anything from him today so I'm hoping the group have contacted him and are dealing with him now.

[Little My]

I hope he gets some appropriate help. Obviously he's not shy about asking though!

[Ella77]

The fucking cheek of him trying to get you both to run the hoover round!

[Loralei]

Yeah, I found out pretty quickly from the tea parties that not all elderlies are apple cheeked old dears We know how many piss takers there are out there so I don't know why I thought they might mellow with age! My dad would have behaved exactly like that, for one.