IWLTS in 2020...

[sally maclennane]

IWLTS: go away, I can't be bothered with you at the best of times, let alone today when I'm in a shitty mood.

IWLTS (to someone else): yes I do mind if you cancel our call because I really wanted to talk to you, mainly because I'm in a shitty mood and you're one of the few people who gets it.

[Margo]

IWLTS oh you poor love. Please do something about your negative body image, walking round in a huge long cardigan in this weather is madness.

To a young girl I saw in Asda. Over her other clothes she was wearing a heavy long woollen cardigan, I suspect because she’s a bit on the large side (18? 20?). I’m guessing she was ashamed of her size, I can’t think of any other reason.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a size 18 or 20 btw, I just felt terribly sorry for her as she did look really uncomfortable even in the relative cool of Asda.

[Morganna]

Someone I know (an ex-student with quite serious mental health issues) posted something on her blog recently about covering up. She said she hates it when the sun comes out, as people start saying 'Aren't you hot in that cardigan/long sleeved top?' and she doesn't know what to say, as she is wearing it to cover scars from when she cut herself.

I hadn't thought about that, and chalked it up as something not to say to anyone in future. I don't know if I've said it before, but it's the sort of 'making conversation' thing that I wouldn't have thought through until I read the post.

[Margo]

It’s so sad, isn’t it?

My mum always says (usually when I’m putting on lippy and checking my hair before going out), don’t bother, nobody’s looking at you... which I get and is probably true, but at the same time I wouldn’t be seen dead looking a state (by my own standards). It’s such a shame for anyone with body image issues or someone needing to cover scars; it’s awful that they’re so scared of other people’s judgement

[rosy]

My sister used to spend every summer in long sleeved tops and jeans to cover self-harm scars. She doesn’t do that now, but it’s taken a lot of work. I’m so proud of her.

[Kenickie]

I find supermarkets freezing so if I'm dressed for hot weather outside then I'd have to put a jumper or a cardie on to shop.

[Skips]

Yes, I hate going in the supermarket in summer as I just freeze. I've had a hoodie on in the past.

[Margo]

Of course it’s possible that she was just cold but it wasn’t ‘that’ cold in there.

[Marth]

Easier said than done really, sorting out a negative self image. I'm just watching that documentary with Jesy from Little Mix, who was bullied so badly for being overweight she tried to kill herself.

[Heebie Jeebie]

I find supermarkets freezing so if I'm dressed for hot weather outside then I'd have to put a jumper or a cardie on to shop.

I was going to say that too. I have been known to have to wear gloves to do a food shop in my nearest M&S food hall.

[Ella77]

Supermarkets are flipping freezing.

[Morganna]

Being cold is the most likely explanation, yes .

It just brought to mind what the student had said about perfectly innocent remarks making her life difficult, and how I hadn't considered that before.

[Luce]

The idea of going to a supermarket without a proper cardy is horrifying me! Brr. I very much doubt she was ashamed if she was that size, it's hardly unusual.

[Lily]

Easier said than done really, sorting out a negative self image. I'm just watching that documentary with Jesy from Little Mix, who was bullied so badly for being overweight she tried to kill herself.

That was horrible. I always thought Jesy strikingly pretty and now she's inflated her lips to terrifying dimensions.

She could have not shaved under her arms, Margo. I wore a coat on a very hot summer's day because I hadn't.

[Blondiejude]

I agree with all comments here, even now I’d wear a cardigan to a family event as everyone there feels it’s their right to comment “has jude lost weight? Gained weight? Is she Ill again? Is she getting bigger?” All because they know I’ve in the past had an eating disorder and whilst I’m ok now I freely admit in times of stress I find it hard to eat, in much the same way a comfort eater would down four bars of chocolate. But somehow I’m open to comment and it’s bloody awful.

Let face it no one would ever say “Christ you got fat!” Yet somehow “bloody hell you look ill!” Is totally acceptable.

Sorry will get off my high horse now

[Blondiejude]

And for the turtle record I always take a cardigan to Tesco as the fridge freezer sections are brutal even in August.

[sally maclennane]

People absolutely say stuff like "Christ, you got fat!" Obviously neither comment is acceptable.

[Pippedydeadeye]

“You’re looking well!” is code for “you got fat!”

[sally maclennane]

When I was about 22, someone said to me "you're fairly piling on the beef"

[Panda]

Urgh, I hate that Blondiejude. A friend of mine struggles to put on weight and has been reduced to tears by the cutting remarks made by colleagues who tell her she needs to ‘fatten up’ because she’s ‘skin and bones’.