IWLTS in 2020...

[Disco]

That's brilliant, Liv. I wish I could've seen 101+ faces; his and all of theirs.

What's that about Kleio?

[Livilla]

Yes!

"Er, is your mother there?"
"No! She's gone to have a poo!"

Did you catch him or did you come back to be told about it?

Thank goodness he hadn't also switched the microphone on, so they could only see him. And I came back into the room not only to see him, but also to a large number of messages from people saying Busted! and HAHAHAHA etc.

[Kleio]

Liv! I bet that was a lot of fun for them though !

What's that about Kleio?

Just dickhead again. He didn’t send Betty a birthday card as he didn’t think it was important and said that he thought licking a stamp and envelope was too dangerous and apparently his parents aren’t dealing with any handwritten post. When I pointed out to him that self adhesive stamps, sellotape and antibac wipes exist he sent me a load of bluster and bollocks.

Then, yesterday, a letter came from a penpal she has there. A handwritten letter with a stamp and everything. He’d passed on our address to facilitate post being sent.

I really enjoyed pointing out this massive contradiction (Betty asked me to) and receiving his very panicked response. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall to see what his face looked like when he realised he didn’t have a leg to stand on.

[Disco]

He's such a cock.

[Lily]

Liv, that is brilliant. I bet your colleagues loved it.

Nobody has licked stamps since about 1908!

[wendy james]

IWLTS Please stop calling me to pass on the moans from my DR if you don't think I've actually done anything wrong. We waste an hour rehashing the same shit, in total agreement that she's the one with the problem and you telling me that the complaints are groundless.

[Ruby]

IWLTS Please stop calling me to pass on the moans from my DR if you don't think I've actually done anything wrong. We waste an hour rehashing the same shit, in total agreement that she's the one with the problem and you telling me that the complaints are groundless.

I have this exact problem, Wendle.

[wendy james]

I feel for you. I did say it of sorts, and said I’m happy to have some sort of facilitated meeting to actually deal with it, but have no interest in hearing about her moans unless we’re going to do something about it.

[Ruby]

That sounds shit, Wendle. I've had enough of mine. I go out of my way to be nice to her and talk to her about her 'worries' and she says everything is fine ... then she goes and whines to someone else about how overwhelmed she is, with the implication that is my fault.

[smalex]

IWLTS: It really isn't necessary to post a screen shot photo on fb of all your faces on the video call absolutely every time you do one.

[smalex]

me again.

IWLTS: I cannot just magic up more space in your attic. Are we just going to go round in circles where I tell you it would be low and crap, you go quiet for 2 months and then come back and ask me again. The answer is the same as it's been for the last 9 months! I'm really going to lose my shit if you ask me again.

[Edith Bacon]

IWLTS: There’s just no pleasing you, is there

[Ruby]

IWLTS: There’s just no pleasing you, is there

Look, I thought I was OK but actually I really need some Haribo now and not just crisps. I am allowed to change my mind.

[Edith Bacon]

[Ruby]

Go and get me some Haribo, Edith.

[Edith Bacon]

I am feeling irrationally sad about your lack of Haribo

[Ella77]

Go and get me some Haribo, Edith.

What happened to all your jelly sweets, young lady?

[Ruby]

I HAVE DEFINITELY NOT EATEN A KILO OF THEM IN A WEEK.

[Ella77]

I’m not far behind you. They’re so delicious.

[SunnyMum]

Haribo is the only reason I'm surviving the lockdown.