The Mock Turtle

I’ve identified that they’re crawling out of a gap in the skirting. So I’ve sealed it up with masking tape for now which has stopped them coming into the kitchen

I don’t know that a bomb will work if I can’t get it under the floorboards. But it might be worth a try. I have the key to the Airbnb we’re moving to already so we could just move there early.

FFS! My life at the moment

From memory (which I've mostly tried to block out obv ), the worst was over in 2-3 days max. I'm so sorry you've been afflicted!

I would put expanding foam in the gap. It will likely be over within a week tops. We didn't get many flies but I did a disgusting amount of research.

Hello!

The rat man came and did his thing a couple of weeks ago and now we’re into the rotting stench phase . It’s awful! I’ve ordered one of Del’s bags to put under the floorboards.

My house smells of nasty cheap candle* on top of dead rat, and is freezing due to all the open windows.
(*I’m NOT using the good candles for this. I bought one optimistically called “open window” which smells vile in itself.)

The rat man said that you only get one dead rat, as they eat their dead pals until you’re left with the last man standing king rat. Who has now died under our floorboards.

Such fun

Oh man.

Perhaps we need to decamp to a fancy hotel for a few weeks?

Oh GOD. I'm sorry. This is a terrible tale.

Dear Lord

I am so sorry Squiz. The is nothing to cover the stench of dead rat. Keep the windows open as much as you can. I really, really sympathise.

I pray the fly phase is brief for you

When approx should I expect the fly phase? Everything is reasonably well sealed so I’m hoping they don’t come into the house too much, is this even slightly realistic?

Looking back through this thread of woe and despair it was just under a month. Longer than I thought - I’d recovered from dead rat stench so was completely horrified when they started appearing in such huge numbers one week before we were due to move

I still get emails from the neighbourhood watch lady on our old street (despite asking her to take me off her list) and houses all down the street are plagued Do you know if your neighbours have them too?

Okay I’ll brace myself for that. Yes our adjoining neighbour has had the rats too, I think their side has been more seriously affected. I feel bad for them as the couple only moved into the house just before Christmas.

In general we’re near the river and next to countryside and it’s no secret that there are a lot of rats in this area! I know they had problems in the adjoining neighbour’s house about 10 years ago (before our time).

My deepest, deepest sympathies Squiz

Although I've tried my best to eradicate memories of my time in rat hell, I think the fly phase was very, very bad on days 1-3 of the plague, and tapered off by the end of the week. No fixed timelines from first stench to flypocalypse though. And you may even get lucky and avoid it altogether if they find another exit point.

They should be investigating the sewer pipes if the whole street is buggered. It is so, so grim.

Did I ever tell tmt about our Terrible Fly Incident? I think it was while I wasn't posting last summer and I honestly can't remember if I ever mentioned it since. If I didn't I'll amuse/horrify you all with it tomorrow (I'm going to bed now and CBA to type it out on my phone ). Its worth tuning in for

Please tell us. I feel like I need to surround myself with people who have other tales of horrible pests. My friend shared a horrifying anecdote of a carpet of woodlice.

I will in the morning, I promise. Solidarity squizz.

genuine thanks

We never got the plague of flies, Squiz, so you might be lucky. It's not peak fly season after all.