Counteracting the clutter in 2023

[Kenickie]

Can you give yourself a three month deadline for the ones you really love and get rid if you haven't used by then?

I need to get rid of the bed base and mattress from our old bed. It's against the wall in the currently spare bedroom at the moment. Teddy's baptism is in July so people will be wanting to stay so would be a bit handy for that. It's not really in the way but does make that room look a bit rubbish. Should I keep or get rid now?

[ParisGal]

Ooh tricky one, would it be your only spare bed?

My current plan re the glasses is to make more of a thing of having cocktails / special drinks at the weekend. Fits in nicely with the ridiculous amount of weird alcohols we've accumulated, except that I already tried last year and finding recipes that use up something unusual but don't need other unusual things that we don't have in is surprisingly difficult I've also decluttered the beautiful cocktail recipe book I've kept for years but never used as I always look them up online.

[Hobbes]

Any tips for people with ADHD appreciated. My husband is ADHD and we declutter and organize something and then it's a mess again in a week. I've told him we just need to keep paring down until we reach a level that's not overwhelming to him. It doesn't help that I'm slightly OCD and a former semi-hoarder.

I feel your pain, my husband is also ADHD and I have said upthread how much I struggle with his hoarding. Shame you are not in the UK, there was an episode of Sort your life out last week with an adhd husband which was interesting.

One thing I have found useful is to get one category of all my husbands stuff out I.e. shoes, or books, and ask him to sort through just that category. He seems to find that easier, and he’s not overwhelmed by too much distraction at once - he seems to distract easily but can be laser focused when it’s on just one type of item. I then deal with removing anything that needs getting rid of, and putting away anything we are keeping.

I know it’s a bit of hand holding, but it gets it done!

I’ve also started chucking some stuff away, when he’s not here, honestly I don’t care. If there’s a slight chance that we actually needed something from that box of random cables that hasn’t been touched for 10 years then I’ll just buy it again.

[Kenickie]

Ooh tricky one, would it be your only spare bed?

My current plan re the glasses is to make more of a thing of having cocktails / special drinks at the weekend. Fits in nicely with the ridiculous amount of weird alcohols we've accumulated, except that I already tried last year and finding recipes that use up something unusual but don't need other unusual things that we don't have in is surprisingly difficult I've also decluttered the beautiful cocktail recipe book I've kept for years but never used as I always look them up online.

We've got one bed but this would mean my parents and MIL could stay at the same time so we don't have to choose who gets to.

The cocktail making sounds like very enjoyable decluttering. ,;)

[FiveO'Clock]

Any tips for people with ADHD appreciated. My husband is ADHD and we declutter and organize something and then it's a mess again in a week. I've told him we just need to keep paring down until we reach a level that's not overwhelming to him. It doesn't help that I'm slightly OCD and a former semi-hoarder.

I feel your pain, my husband is also ADHD and I have said upthread how much I struggle with his hoarding. Shame you are not in the UK, there was an episode of Sort your life out last week with an adhd husband which was interesting.

One thing I have found useful is to get one category of all my husbands stuff out I.e. shoes, or books, and ask him to sort through just that category. He seems to find that easier, and he’s not overwhelmed by too much distraction at once - he seems to distract easily but can be laser focused when it’s on just one type of item. I then deal with removing anything that needs getting rid of, and putting away anything we are keeping.

I know it’s a bit of hand holding, but it gets it done!

I’ve also started chucking some stuff away, when he’s not here, honestly I don’t care. If there’s a slight chance that we actually needed something from that box of random cables that hasn’t been touched for 10 years then I’ll just buy it again.

I tried to find Sort out your life on YouTube! Not full episodes, but the bits I can watch are great. I've also found Nick Knowles; Big House Clear Out. It's motivated me all over again.

Mr5 is not a hoarder, he doesn't think twice before throwing something out. But he's always in such a rush, he messes up every space that I get organized. Room by room we're sorting, organizing and trying to make it easier to keep things tidy. From looking around our house, I don't think anyone would realize the issues, all hoarding was in closets and drawers just jammed in and stuffed full. While I haven't made any money from decluttering, I've saved loads already by having to think about every purchase I make. I'm hoping it makes it easier for my husband, he gets overwhelmed too.

[Little My]

Ooh, link me up if you find any particularly good episodes.

I bought a partitioned container for B, to help keep his bathroom drawer organized. It was a very satisfying 5 minute job of taking everything out, and only returning the things he actually uses. He is actually pretty good about getting rid of stuff, he just needs the body doubling to get it done.

[Froozy]

I tried to find Sort out your life on YouTube! Not full episodes, but the bits I can watch are great. I've also found Nick Knowles; Big House Clear Out. It's motivated me all over again.

I think the main thing they did after thinning everything out was to label all the things (drawers, tubs etc) so the guy didn't have to think or make decisions about where something should go back to.

[FiveO'Clock]

That's a really good idea, Froozy. I need to get a bunch of labels

[Hazey_Jane]

I am spending Friday night watching those Nick Knowles videos

But after decluttering and tidying up my apartment three weekends ago, I have kept it clean and tidy since. I am very proud of this!

[FiveO'Clock]

I am spending Friday night watching those Nick Knowles videos

But after decluttering and tidying up my apartment three weekends ago, I have kept it clean and tidy since. I am very proud of this!

This is my new obsession! Nice job on keeping everything clean and tidy!

[Squirrel]

I nearly cried at the chap with adhd on Sort Your Life Out. That house was…. I haven’t even got the words. I’m so glad they got some help.

Five, i think you’re spot on about paring things down until they’re manageable. The overwhelm with ADHD has been one of my biggest lightbulbs. Less stuff + better storage, making things really easy to put away and figuring out systems that work for me have been game changers. I’m still on a big learning curve but apart from general surface clutter / doom piles, I honestly don’t think my house is in a particularly bad state.

[Morganna]

I hear you Squizz. It's hard to do, but it makes such a difference to have more space. Under my stairs used to be boxed in and was crammed with stuff. Opening it up and getting rid of it all was liberating, and I get a real sense of pleasure walking down the hall, however ridiculous that sounds - it's so spacious! Numerous boots, shoes and bags have gone to charity, (there is still a large bag of them upstairs which will need thinning out when I get round to doing the bedrooms ) but otherwise, other than M's Bloody Stereo, everything that's in there is supposed to be there, and it's so calming. I'm going to have to put some coathooks back, I think, but there used to be dozens of coats hanging on top of the shoes, and apart from looking messy we couldn't find anything easily.

There is still the kitchen to do before downstairs is finished. I'd like that to be done by Christmas, but I need a break before thinking about it. Then I still have all of upstairs to sort out and decorate, but sufficient unto the day and all that - I'll cross that bridge when I come to it, and meantime, getting rid of a few bags a month to the collection people will be a big help for when I make a start.

[FiveO'Clock]

I bought a partitioned container for B, to help keep his bathroom drawer organized. It was a very satisfying 5 minute job of taking everything out, and only returning the things he actually uses. He is actually pretty good about getting rid of stuff, he just needs the body doubling to get it done.

Good idea, I'll look for something like that for R.

I'm really looking forward to the photos when you're done with your downstairs decluttering and decorating, Morgs.

Has anyone found their decluttering efforts are affecting their shopping for new things?

[Hazey_Jane]

Good job Morgs!

Yes Five- I’m buying very little at the moment. I don’t need anything and the best way to avoid cluttering in the first place is to not even buy it in the beginning.

[Lola]

Well I’ve recently got rid of several pairs of boots that weren’t quite right but just ordered another pair, so I’m not sure I’ve learnt my lesson

[Morganna]

I have all these bags ready to be collected today - six of them . Since we started this thread I have also taken a bag of yarn to knitting each week (am about to sort another one for today) and there have been three or four extra bags to general waste, and a lot of stuff has gone to people on the local freebies page.

Today has been frustrating, as the carpenter has cried off. He was meant to be coming at 9.00 to fit another shelf above the TV on the bookcase and two in one of the cupboards so that M can cram more CDs in there. Accordingly, I was planning to leave the huge numbers of books on the spare bed until I'd seen how many will fit on the new shelf, then put the rest out for collection. I had also emptied the hundreds of CDs out of the cupboard onto the dining table, thinking that they would have been put back before we needed it. That won't happen, and it's too much hassle to take them all off again, as at least they are stacked where they are.

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So now I can't sort the books to decide which ones to go away with the bags, and the next collection is not until 15 March. I really don't want lots of bags in the hall for another month, and I want my dining table back. I honestly don't know what I am going to get my house properly sorted, as so far it's been one step forward and two steps back, and it's hard enough doing this without getting overwhelmed.

You can see M's Bloody Stereo under the stairs too . He bought it for a king's ransom in the 80s, and is very reluctant to part with it, which I understand (less so about the tape-to-tape recording facility, but anyway). He does play vinyl and CDs, and I have a lot of both too, although I am 99% likely to stream music these days. The trouble is that there is no usb port for a bluetooth dongle, or any other way I can think of to allow it to connect to wireless speakers. Under no circumstances am I having wires draped over my new dining room, or having the enormospeakers that we had before perched on the corners of the shelves. The speakers were good ones at the time, but (a) the fact that they don't distort at 8 million decibels or whatever is hardly important in a terraced house, and (b) you can now get equally good ones that are a tenth of the size. The ideal solution would be to find a way for him to keep the turntable, CD player and amp, but connect them to small wireless speakers. If I could find a way to do that I could probably persuade him to part with the cabinet it's in (full-on 80s style, complete with smoked glass door ), and there is a spare table in the dining room alcove where it could sit; but for now it's a stalemate and it's under the stairs.

sorry. I just feel thwarted at every turn, and want some sympathy .

[Froozy]

Morgs, won’t something like this work on the stereo? You might need one which is a receiver and a sender (more technical terms may apply) but D uses something like this to play music to his wireless headphones from his old analogue stereo.

[Morganna]

Ooh, it may do, Froozy. Thanks. I'm off to knitting in a minute, but will investigate closely when I get back, and if it does I owe you a pint. I think it should just have to send, as there is an amp which happily sent music through the wires, but I am No Expert .

[Lola]

I think Mr M needs a iPod from 20 years ago. It would blow his mind

[rosy]

It all sounds very frustrating, Morgs. I would be ripping all those CDs to a hard drive and then selling them, but I do recognise it’s not what M would want.

My friend C had a friend stay with her last week for a few nights, and R did loads of decluttering for her Even managed to sort out some stuff for the charity shop, which I whisked off before C could change her mind about the contents.

I need to think about the toys I keep here for the grandchildren. I’m not likely to see E&F here for some time since it’s so far to their house; it’s so much easier all round for me to go to them, at least for now. And Tom is mostly into Lego and stuff rather than toys.