Early Pregnancy Thread

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lorri_b
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by lorri_b »

Congrats Ken!

I found the jump from 2-3 fine, probably due to the large age gap. But 3-4 is HARD.
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Lovely Me
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Lovely Me »

I found 0-1 by far the hardest, then it was much easier (and I find it fascinating to see when each individual parent finds it hard, it varies so much!).
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Rhodonite
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Rhodonite »

Congratulations Ken!! Topsy and Tim are going to be a brilliant brother and sister!
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Dutchie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Dutchie »

After having 1 and 2 so close together, I found no.3 a breeze 4.5 years later. Not least because there is none of that first-time-mum stress. And you were a first and srcond-time mum at once!
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

This is all music to my ears. :love: 0-2 was definitely pretty tough. :lol:
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

The sickness has been a bit horrific for the last couple of days, so I spoke to a female GP this morning who was lovely and treated me like an actual person. She's prescribed the good stuff* and has also referred me to EPU to see if they want to do an early scan to check whether it's another multiple pregnancy. I guess it will depend on how busy they are but it would be lovely if it happens. It's so hard to feel this awful and not even know if it's a viable pregnancy yet!

*There has been one study which has linked it to a tiny risk of issues if you have it in the first trimester, but I honestly don't see an alternative as I really can't cope with going through another six or seven weeks of this. I guess that's selfish in a way and not the decision everyone would make but I'm happy with it being the best option overall.
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

Yes, definitely. The EPU would be a bit better as it would be nice to be there is anything is wrong, plus it's actually right by where I work now so much more convenient!

But we paid for a private one last time so would do the same again if the EPU doesn't work out (and I totally understand that they might be busy with urgent or more crucial stuff).
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Loralei
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Loralei »

Confirmation of a potential multiple pregnancy is a perfectly valid reason to go to EPU, Ken. Given your history of twins and HG, plus the link between HG and hcg, I'd say it's sensible. EPU isn't just for potential miscarriages so don't feel guilty.
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

Thanks, Lora. As it goes I rang the EPU on Friday and the referral hadn't actually been done (which seems weird as the GP double checked which phone number to use etc), so I left a message at the surgery asking them to do it but who knows what will happen. So I've booked a private scan for next week when I'll be eight weeks. I'm also going to chase up the midwife referral after that if it's viable - it's an online self referral one but I want to let them know I don't want the only midwife attached to my surgery who I took against last time. ;) Hopefully they will let me go to the hospital ones again or someone at a different surgery.

It's definitely making a huge difference having the proper medication. At this point last time it was when I was losing lots of weight and beginning to need time off work etc. I still feel horrendous pretty much constantly, but I haven't actually been sick since I started the ondanestron and although my eating is mostly crisps and biscuits there's not been one day that I haven't been able to eat at all which is a massive improvement.
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Loralei
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Loralei »

Kenickie wrote: Sun Jan 30, 2022 8:02 am Hopefully they will let me go to the hospital ones again or someone at a different surgery.
You don't need permission. You can absolutely refuse to be cared for by a specific midwife and the trust has an obligation to find a suitable alternative.
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

That's great news. I thought they might tell me I had to change surgery if I didn't want the one attached to mine.
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Ismee
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Ismee »

Lora, can you not move and live near Ken for the next 32 weeks or so, seems like the right thing to do. :yes:

Sorry you're feeling horrendous, ken but I'm glad you've been able to eat a bit more. Everything crossed for your scan.
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Loralei »

Kenickie wrote: Sun Jan 30, 2022 1:51 pm That's great news. I thought they might tell me I had to change surgery if I didn't want the one attached to mine.
Midwifery services are now funded separately from GP services so midwives aren't attached to surgeries. One midwife (or more) from a zone (team) will run clinics in a specific surgery (where they are still welcome) for the convenience of the women they care for, but you can see anyone within their zone if you're prepared to travel to another clinic. It might be a bit more complicated if you wanted to go out of zone but ultimately all you need to say is that you prefer not to be cared for by X, and ask how you arrange an alternative. You don't have to give a reason and they absolutely shouldn't penalise you (such as forcing you to change surgeries).

Good luck for the scan! Are we hoping for just one? I'm glad you have decent meds and - for what it's worth - I'd have made the same decision re taking them.

I think Ken can manage just fine, Is, and probably prefers her internet weirdos to stay out of examination reach :))
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

I would definitely like a local Lora. ;)

Thanks for explaining, that's really helpful, and useful phrasing to use as well.

P is hoping for just one, I'd absolutely love two again emotionally, but practically just one would be so much easier, so I'll be happy either way really (I think just a bit wistful if it's one, and I'm also a bit worried about them feeling like the odd one out but I guess it's just as likely that they'll team up with either Topsy or Tim and it'll be Topsy or Tim that feel left out. Or maybe they'll just all three be perfect best friends forever just like me and my two siblings :look:).
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Loralei
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Loralei »

I know three families with twins + 1 and their dynamics are similar to my lot, in that they each have a different relationship with each of their siblings and loyalties ebb and flow. I do think having mixed sex twins helps prevent too much 'them and us', but ultimately they're all individuals, aren't they?

I am glad that was helpful. If your To Read list allows, I highly recommend Give Birth Like a Feminist. It is all about informed choice, and how this is a fallacy if women aren't aware of, and confident in, their options regarding maternity care.
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

That is good to hear from both of you!

I read a sample of that book before and I think I (possibly irrationally) took against it because some of the stuff she said (and her choice to say natural rather than vaginal birth which always annoys me) seemed like the tone was 'you should have the right to make choices, but if you choose the medicalised stuff you're wrong'. I will give it a proper go if it's not going to make me feel bad for definitely not wanting to consider a VBAC. ;)
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Loralei
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Loralei »

I have issues with the term natural birth, but it's the correct term in midwifery (and appropriately so. I've changed my opinion on this and am happy to discuss, but will keep it off the EP thread.) It is really difficult for any writer to discuss birth choices without having to push back against the normalisation of medicalised birth, but I know that can alienate those of us for whom intervention was best. I would suggest reading on as she gets just as angry about women being denied caesareans, but if it's too much you might prefer to read the 2016 Better Birth report. Or nothing, given your right to choose ;)
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

:)) I will read on then! That's really interesting about it being the correct term in midwifery. Maybe we need another thread.

I have great news - got a phone call from my GP this morning, and have my EPU scan on Thursday so I'm going to cancel/postpone my private one. Annoyingly it's when I need to be in a couple of work meetings so I'm having to awkwardly leave early/arrive late without wanting to tell anyone why. I'm also slightly worried about holding it together if it's bad news but I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. Plus if it is bad news, it's much better to be in the EPU and get all the advice etc on the spot.

The sickness has actually been a bit better and I've been able to eat some fairly normal (but beige) lunch so obviously I'm panicking that's a bad sign rather than actually enjoying it. :ella:
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Kenickie
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Kenickie »

And more good news, I have had my midwife booking in set up, and there was no problem to switch to a hospital midwife (well, apart from the fact the person I spoke to was very new and didn't know how to do it but it all got sorted very quickly).

Although good news on the stuffiness front was very short lived so I definitely should have enjoyed it! :lol:
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Loralei
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Re: Early Pregnancy Thread

Post by Loralei »

That's great news re EPU and the midwife. Do you mean sickness reprieve didn't last? I hope you are at least reassured :))
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