Secondary Considerations

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wendy james
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by wendy james »

Oh no, awkward! I'd probably end up being super unsubtle and being all "YEAH LET'S GO SEE THIS FILM. BOB AND JENNY WANT TO SEE IT TOO, SHALL WE ASK THEM? COS OTHERWISE PEOPLE MIGHT THINK IT'S A DATE HA HA HA!" :lol:

While I'm here, my optimism over the seemingly mature approach taken by friends to deal with a problem they had with Sproglette has appeared to be less simple than I thought. It's still bubbling away and she's finding it quite upsetting it now as she's being ignored at school (with blatant whispered discussion about her) then evening WhatsApp messages rehashing it. Hurrah for 9 days left of term is all I can say (the final week is activities week and she's with two proper friends for her choice!).
Cerise
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Cerise »

Poor Sproglette. All the Year 8 girls I know of have had some kind of friendship issue this year. I hope the summer hols provide a break.

We tried that approach before for bowling. Her two friends conveniently couldn’t make it and of the two friends of J’s that he thought he could trust with the situation, one was busy with family stuff and the other said, “Ha ha, no thanks. Good luck!” :mog:
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Kleio
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Kleio »

That’s awful for Sproglette. Kids can be so hideous to each other.

We’ve had that situation with Betty recently and she got one of her friends to break the news to them.
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Little My
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Little My »

Girls can be particularly mean. Hopefully the summer will lay it all to rest.

I think he might need to strap on his big boy pants and talk to her in person about the situation, rather than texting. Is he just not wanting to date, or does he specifically not want to date HER? And does he still want to hang out with her as friends, or would he rather not do that anymore?
Cerise
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Cerise »

He basically doesn’t seem interested in dating, full stop.

It all seems sorted. We composed a message saying that he already had a plan to see the film with someone else but that he wanted to be honest and say that he didn’t want to date her (not in this words) and that he was sorry of he had misread the situation. The resulting text conversation went like this:

A: I am not sure I like boys at all
A: So no, I’m not looking to be your girlfriend
J: Sorry for misreading and I hope this won’t make things awkward
A: I thought you were dating C (another girl)
J: C is gay so no

:mog: :mog:

Where’s the manual on this stuff? :lol:
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emma_p
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by emma_p »

Sounds like he handled it well.
Cerise
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Cerise »

emma_p wrote: Tue Jul 02, 2024 3:43 pm Sounds like he handled it well.
He’s such kind soul that the stress caused his skin to go blotchy!
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Cerise »

emma_p wrote: Tue Jul 02, 2024 3:43 pm Sounds like he handled it well.
He’s such kind soul that the stress caused his skin to go blotchy!
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emma_p
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by emma_p »

Oh, bless him, that's so sweet. It's a tricky situation and a feel a lot of kids would have just avoided the conversation! George is going through a socially awkward teenage phase and could never have handled that.

He's actually gone out this evening to a cafe to meet his friends though!
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Pippedydeadeye
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Pippedydeadeye »

That’s really lovely, Cerise. I’m glad it appears to have worked out.

Chunk had his girlfriend round for tea last night!!
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Texaco Shirley
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Texaco Shirley »

Yesterday I heard about a local secondary school that makes the students earn their invitation to prom by good behaviour, attendance etc so only about half of the y11s were allowed to go. Is this common? It sounds shit.
Cerise
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Cerise »

Texaco Shirley wrote: Wed Jul 10, 2024 8:53 am Yesterday I heard about a local secondary school that makes the students earn their invitation to prom by good behaviour, attendance etc so only about half of the y11s were allowed to go. Is this common? It sounds shit.
Ours does that too but it’s only a handful of students that can’t go.
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Pippedydeadeye
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Pippedydeadeye »

Yes, it happens here with trips too. And used to also happen with non-uniform days at the end of each half term, but the current leaders bloody love uniform so that never happens any more.
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emma_p
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by emma_p »

That sounds like something G’s school would do, tbh. But they don’t even have a prom!
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Pippedydeadeye
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Pippedydeadeye »

I heard of one school with so many excluded from prom that they did their own rebel prom for rebels.

Squeak’s school booked somewhere that wouldn’t accommodate everyone anyway, so that does a bit of self selection in itself.
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Pippedydeadeye
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Pippedydeadeye »

Another of Squeak’s friends from rugby had their prom completely cancelled with about two week’s notice because the marquee hire firm let them down apparently. A group of parents worked together to find a venue last minute because the school just threw their hands in the air.
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Topcat »

The selective shit sounds like absolute arseholery to me.
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Texaco Shirley
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Texaco Shirley »

I can understand a handful of exclusions. I think the difference is that this sounded like not being invited was the default position and if you did really well you would be rewarded. I don’t think I’m explaining this very well.
Cerise
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Cerise »

No, I get you. Start with nothing and earn the invitation against having and losing the invitation.

I am not against it and it meant that some of the absolute shit bag trouble makers didn’t get to go but I also know of someone whose attendance was bad due to mental health and she didn’t get to go.

If it means that half of the year can’t go though, perhaps they need to be worrying more about actively improving attendance and behaviour in other ways!
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Little My
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Re: Secondary Considerations

Post by Little My »

That would not fly here, and I'm glad of that because I think it's bloody awful! If you're graduating, you get to go to prom.
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