Juvenile Jibber Jabber

[viggy]

[Zoomer]

I was explaining the concept of voting to A today. She looked quite sombre. "Mammy, I don't want anyone to vote for me."
Luckily, it appears she hasn't got through to the second round.

[Jet]

S has been on form today. Part of his Easter treats was some chocolate covered sunflower seeds. He’d eaten them all by later in the day and Mr J commented that he’d finished them and he said ‘what can I say? It’s just who I am!’

Then when he was brushing his teeth tonight he asked me to come hang out (which he’s been asking a lot) so I went in and sat down on the floor. I was painting today so am wearing some ancient yoga pants that have a seam split at the thigh. He noticed and pointed it out and I said ‘yeah my thigh is spilling out’ and he said ‘well, you didn’t skip leg day!!’

I just said ‘no, no I did not!’ I’ll take it.

[viggy]

“I’m sorry Mama, I forget sometimes that you’re a person too and you deserve to be talked to nicely”

We’re having a lot of Big Feelings in the house lately

[rosy]

Elf has been badgering me if he can watch something on Netflix. I eventually went to watch the trailer and noticed it was a U certificate. I explained to him that he can watch anything on kids Netflix or if it had a U symbol in a green triangle.

“So anyone can watch stuff with a green triangle?”

“Yes it means universal so it means for everyone. Ask me about PG and up.”

“Absolutely everyone!? Even people on death row?”

It's good that he's concerned for murderers, I guess?

[Pippedydeadeye]

“I’m sorry Mama, I forget sometimes that you’re a person too and you deserve to be talked to nicely”

We’re having a lot of Big Feelings in the house lately

I wish my kids would remember this.

[viggy]

This evening I looked up at the living room window to see the words “SUK a dick” in small letters on the glass BM had written them with a spy pen, BACKWARDS so they would have been legible from outside….or at least legible for any spies walking by with their spy pen black lights on

I was so shocked I didn’t even think to use any euphemisms and just asked her point blank “did you write suck a dick on the window?!” then sent her off for cleaning products. She was just about holding it together until she saw me taking a photo to send to her Dad (who would find it hilarious) and the shame completely overtook her and she ran away for a sob, convinced she’s the worst child in the WORLD

I had to leave her sobbing for a bit because I didn’t want to laugh right in her face but she did eventually calm down and clean it off, with the promise it’s never spoken about again. Honestly though, what was she thinking?!

[Smunder Woman]

[Leap]

Oh my god “Did you write suck a dick on the window?” Howling

[viggy]

I’m so glad you get it I know in another context, with a different attitude behind it, this could have been considered properly horrible behaviour, so obviously I had to keep a straight face and so on… But it gave us a much needed belly laugh yesterday

[Glint]

[Annabella]

Viggy, that is hilarious - BUT let's hope she can keep it in the can for a response to some dickhead later in live, when she might need it.

[Jet]

I'm crying, bless her Imagine being a spy and all you get is told to suck a dick

I had to explain to S what toxic means when used about a person as he thought it meant 'rude' and using it wildly inappropriately about an adult who has just said something mildly rude in jest.

[viggy]

Viggy, that is hilarious - BUT let's hope she can keep it in the can for a response to some dickhead later in live, when she might need it.

Oh I wouldn’t worry about her resurrecting the phrase any time soon - apart from sternly telling her to wash it off straight away I didn’t even need to give her into trouble, her nine year old guilt was overwhelming enough!

[viggy]

I'm crying, bless her Imagine being a spy and all you get is told to suck a dick

I just need to crack this secret code and……Oh.

[Tits McGee]

That reminds me of the time a 7-year-old L got a bit too caught up in an episode of The Worst Witch and shouted “Ethel Hallow’s a fuckhead!” M was so taken aback he asked “What did you just say?!” so (obviously ) she repeated it, and when she saw the look of incredulity on his face she said “it’s a swear, Daddy.”

[Smunder Woman]

[viggy]

It’s a swear

[viggy]

“I like the noodles, but I’m not keen on the broth”

BM, trying a pot noodle for the first time

[Princess Morripov]

Biggie loves a pot noodle