Simon Baron-Cohen can stuff right off

[Smunder Woman]

I had to change one because it originally said, "dislike of change" and he said, "well, I don't think that's accurate because I would enjoy change at a societal level, I just don't like change in my personal circumstances". OK, then...


This might be some evidence in itself

[Derek Nimmo]

I know I've said this before, but a diagnosis in his youth rather than at age 40 would have transformed my ex's life - entirely despite himself, he managed to get a career as a corporate lawyer but fuck me life in general was an uphill, dramatic and constant struggle.

You're absolutely doing the right thing to push for a diagnosis, whether or not the SAM thinks he needs or wants it. You're giving him options that he won't have without it, that's all.

[Ruby]

Thanks, Del. It's this sort of thing - thinking of him as an adult - that has made up my mind.

This might be some evidence in itself

Well, honestly, you just need to have a conversation with him. It really wouldn't be much of a shock to anyone concerned.

[Beena]

SAM always sounds like such a great kid, Ruby and I think you're doing the right thing.

Yep, this was me with Mini. She was formally diagnosed at Uni and it didn't change anything, other than her wanting to constantly drop out as she was so demoralised with the process and her lecturer's attitude to her.

Duo, was it difficult to get a formal diagnosis in place while Mini was at Uni? And didn't change attitudes towards her?

Bambs has an appointment with Adult MH services at the end of this month (having been referred back in March 2021) and she's been asking whether she should mention her suspicions. I don't know. She has a long term medical condition (thyrotoxicosis) and her care broke down completely last time we moved. I'm wary that more she has going on, the more there is to cope with. The whole point of taking a year out was to be in a better place, but it's a total shambles really.

We've just spent the last 2 days walking around while she plotted out routes between places (halls, Waterstones, bubble tea shop - all the priorities) and she scoped out the study spaces. At least she knows where she's going and where she wants to sit.

[Florin]

I would definitely pursue as so much easier to do when you can get some input from school - and that they can complete the screening questionnaires

This is the main screening questionnaire we use in CAMHS (one for parent and one for adults) along with separate form for young people to complete. Usually if they pass the threshold, we will complete a detailed developmental history and an ADOS

https://psychology-tools.com/test/autis ... stionnaire

Let me know if you have any questions

[Beena]

Do you use the same test with adults, Florin? If I'd been completing it for Bambs at primary school, she would have scored much higher. I don't know if she's outgrown some of her quirks or if she's just better at hiding them.

[Duophonic]

Yep, this was me with Mini. She was formally diagnosed at Uni and it didn't change anything, other than her wanting to constantly drop out as she was so demoralised with the process and her lecturer's attitude to her.

Duo, was it difficult to get a formal diagnosis in place while Mini was at Uni? And didn't change attitudes towards her?

This might be a bit of an epic post but I'll try and keep it short.

Mini has always been as everyone has described on here, out of step with her peers. Didn't seem to get social cues etc. All classic signs and not surprising as I have autism and my father has too.

She managed to navigate through school but just wasn't a box ticker so found most exams difficult but because of her talent for writing she was accepted into her choice of Uni. So far so good.
1st and 2nd year she sailed through, deciding to specialise in Medieval Lit. High grades and she loved it. It fell apart 3rd year, she struggled massively and she decided that she would go through disability services and try to get to the bottom of the disconnect, her time management was awful and she was struggling massively with changing attitudes to her failing grades.

She booked a psychology review and was told that she'd have to pay $250 (soz I'm on a US keyboard) and that would be refunded if they found anything.

The review was basically a half hr talk with an IQ test in and she was 'diganosed' with dyscalculia, dyspraxia and borderline autism. He managed to do all this in half an hr???? She did badly in the IQ test and from then on in it was used as a stick to beat her with.

The dept tried to get her to quit the course numerous times, she had no disability assistance at all, not even the resources she was promised.
She was accused of plagiarism due to her scoring highly on a test she did in old norse and her lecturer brought up her IQ test again and again saying that it was impossible someone with such a low IQ could possibly pass the test. This was later dropped when she did another test alone with the lecturer trying to catch her out.
A lecturer who was teaching a random sci-fi block that MIni had taken stood her in front of the study group explaining that he had no idea why she was there as her IQ test was so low it was amazing that she'd managed to find the class at all.
They refused to update her academic transcript so that she couldn't transfer to another university.
After numerous complaints she asked to graduate with an ordinary degree a BA and they agreed, she then had to fight to not attend the graduation but when they finally conceded they sent her degree in the post and awarded her a 1st class MA with distinction. After someone (we have no idea who) went through and completely updated her academic transcript.

TL;DR - the diagnosis actually made things worse and I have to fight the urge every time I'm in Glasgow not to burn the whole fucking place to the ground.

[Duophonic]

As a side note - she wanted to be an archivist understanding that she would need to remain in academic circles. Glasgow Uni destroyed all that.

She's now a trainee funeral director which she loves.

[baargain]

Woah! Duo! What the fuck!

[Duophonic]

That's only a tiny sample of what she went through. 5 fucking years of fighting and the guilt I feel for pushing her to continue will never go away.

I have no idea how she managed it without hurting herself.

[Beena]

What the actual fuck! That is absolutely appalling. That is totally unethical. Poor Mini.

[Beena]

You shouldn't feel guilty either, Duo. You're not responsible for the University's response and if Mini had quit, it may not have helped her in other ways. I don't understand what an IQ test had to do with anything to begin with.

Oddly Glasgow offered Bambs ridiculously low grades for History based on nothing more than her application. Her GCSEs weren't sparkling. It didn't quite make sense.

[Lily]

Oh poor, poor Mini. I am disgusted by that. I wish we could take them all to court. :vague: Poor Mini.

[baargain]

I used to do IQ tests when working in a paediatric psych dept when screening for ASC etc. But we were looking for certain patterns between the different aspects of the tests (as well as an overall score), which may indicate certain diagnoses. We also used them as the basis for coming up with helpful strategies to support the child (make stuff picture based, not text based etc).

This was over a decade ago though, and the specific test (WASI or WAIS) we used took more than half an hour to administer, and was just one bit of a wider assessment. So wtf were they doing.

It should not have been used as a punishment/shaming tool, or a way to exclude Mini! Especially publicly! Wtf!

[Little My]

That's absolutely horrifying, Duo! I can't believe lecturers would behave that way. I'm also very surprised by the use of an IQ test and how much importance they placed on it.

[Smunder Woman]

Jesus, duo. It does not surprise me though.

My IQ test during the diagnostic shit something like I did not have the capacity to be taught. It's such horseshit.

[Zoomer]

Jesus Christ, that is fucking appalling! I'm so sorry for Mini, and you too, Duo. And you anol, Smun..."did not have the capacity to be taught" indeed! I hope you go back and wave your PhD in their faces.

[baargain]

Fuck sake. You can't even tell that from a proper IQ test! What the fuck are these people using? If you "can't be taught", then you'd score zero, and need 24 hour care ffs.

[Duophonic]

It's just so archaic as a system. The major issue I had when speaking to them was that if it had been a commercial enterprise everyone involved would've been sacked.

From the office staff at the bottom to the head of dept, it was an absolute farce.

[Ruby]

Duo! Christ. I can't believe how unprofessional that is? What the fuck type of IQ test are they using?

This is the main screening questionnaire we use in CAMHS (one for parent and one for adults) along with separate form for young people to complete. Usually if they pass the threshold, we will complete a detailed developmental history and an ADOS

https://psychology-tools.com/test/autis ... stionnaire

Thank you. Yes, he scores quite highly on that. Particularly on the first 5 or 6 questions. :)) I have zero faith in his school completing anything tbh. We shall see. Maybe college might be better.